Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
