you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Randomize
