how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
