I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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