Do you still have your period?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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