Pants 0. Shit 1.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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