i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
