No awkward lesbian experiences without me
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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