I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
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