next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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