and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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