Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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