so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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