Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize