What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
she looked like the before picture.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
