are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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