I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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