she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
