he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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