we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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