I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
