and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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