I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i need to put some appletini on your dick
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
