help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
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