he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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