i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
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