brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
