So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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