Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize