On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
