I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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