You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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