Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
