i was born a porn star she said
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
