You're a womanizer and a bitch.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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