I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
