The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Randomize