how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
now i know why i became what i already was.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
