why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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