So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
im having a threesome with these popsicles
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize