low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
The beers last night were like the tears from god
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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