is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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