Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize