Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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