Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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