today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
