did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I want a musical about memes.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
