didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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