i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize