I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I'm sobbing to NWA
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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