I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
