what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
We had sex on a dog bed..
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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