the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
